Okay, so yesterday was a very charged post, but today is much lighter, I assure you. First of all let me say I feel kind of embarrassed about the last blog, and it's probably because I'm feeling a little guilt over just laying our family woes out on the cybertable for everyone to see (yes, my zero humble followers). I also feel some guilt because when Mom and Peter arrived home from their dinner out, she seemed much more connected and vibrant than I've seen her in a long time. Peter's daughter came over with her two kids, and Mom was totally into it, paging through garden books with the little girl on the couch. It was strange that I attracted the opposite vibration I was putting out, or did I? Perhaps underneath my surface frustration my vibration was a positive one, a hopeful one. Whatever it was I felt guilty for even saying those things about her. After Peter's daughter left, Mom continued to engage in conversation until she stepped out to the porch for a cigarette. Despite this blip in my expectations, I maintain that yesterday's post is an accurate portrayal of my thought and feeling process in that moment, and I can't take that back. Every family has problems, mine is no different, and they need to be expressed, if only in journal form.
So, let us continue. Little by little I've been going through a book I got for Christmas Born to Manifest because I'm really needing a boost in my manifestation skills. Today I read a chapter primarily about money, which is high on my priority list. It recommends doing a couple exercises daily, one called $10,000/day and one where you observe and celebrate all that you are abundant in. This is to get in the habit of giving off a vibration of abundance.
(Hold up, I'm confused about something, I need to work it out. They say the Law of Attraction simply brings you what you are vibrating. If you say "I want $10,000" but don't really BELIEVE you are going to get it, that vibration transcends the words you say, and you don't get it. Similarly when you say "I don't want my sister to read my diary" your sister is probably going to read your diary because you BELIEVE she really is going to read it, and also the Law of Attraction does not recognize negating words, only the vibration you put out when you say them. This explains why so often the opposite of what we are wishing and wanting to happen, particularly when using negating words, unfortunately happens. So following this model, were you to say "I don't want to make a lot of money," wouldn't you actually start making a lot of money simply because not only do you probably BELIEVE this statement but the Law of Attraction does not recognize negating words? Wouldn't the LOA simply hear "I want to make a lot of money"? Or would you continue to attract nothing because you really believe and are vibrating the same negative statement, that you won't make a lot of money? I guess when we say a negating comment, "I don't want it to rain today," we're vibrationally believing the positive statement "It will rain today," therefore it rains. The 'don't' is a futile attempt to trick ourselves out of a bad experience. In this case BAD = POSITIVE STATEMENT: "it will rain today," "I have to go on food stamps," "my wife will leave me." But when the positive statement is one that we as humans have been conditioned to believe will NOT and CANNOT happen to us, when we wish for the positive statement "I want $10,000," we're really BELIEVING "I will never get $10,000," which is a stronger vibration than the positive words stated in the first sentence. It's all about vibration, not simply receiving the opposite of what we say. We're just conditioned to expect the negative; we have to consciously teach ourselves to accept that we deserve the positive. Okay, I answered my question. Thanks for your help.)
And we're back. The Vibration of Abundance. So often we can't really pull the feeling of Abundance out of a hat--what does abundance feel like? The book reminds us to recognize the moments when we feel abundant: when you get paid, when you have a kitchen full of groceries, when you're surrounded by family, when you and your partner are snuggled together in bed. The more we recognize these moments, the more the Law of Attraction will recognize these vibrations and deliver you an abundance of them! If we can give as much time to a feeling of abundance as we can, we can only receive more of that feeling. Then you can begin to direct the abundance in whatever areas of your life you want it. So today, I am very abundant in love and family: Mike is always with me, his support is all-pervasive, and I am thankful for my sisters, mother, and dog Jack, invaluable centerpieces of my life. I am abundant in friends, though they are not with me physically, they are all over the world, surrounding me in a comforting global cocoon! I am abundant in shelter with a lovely roof over my head and a warm bed to sleep in. I am abundant in television, to use as much or as little as I want, as well as all the free movies I want. I am currently abundant in some foods (haha), like bread, peanut butter, ramen noodles, eggs, greens, raspberry preserves, and tea. I am abundant in and grateful for connection with my baby and birth choices--I know I can deliver naturally and safely in whatever position I want, and I get to bring him home right after. This is unheard of for a lot of women out there!
So there, I am full of abundance. I recognize it, celebrate it, and am eager to receive more of it. Now you try it! It makes you feel good! The other exercise called $10,000/day is fun, but also kind of challenging. If you had $10,000 to spend today, what would you spend it on? You can play again tomorrow. So really you get $10,000 every day to spend on whatever you want. This was challenging for me because I started getting all up in my head and didn't know what I would spend it on. Maybe that's a block for me, why I'm not receiving an abundance of money, because it's hard for me to believe I'm going to receive it, therefore I just don't have strong intentions for it. Well, I'm working on that! Today I would go to Whole Foods and have a major shopping spree and also order bee products online. I would buy radical baby furniture and the rest of the supplies I need to prepare for his birth. Oh shit, I'd pay off my debt, too! It would only take me...three days of $10,000 to pay off my debt? So whew, glad that's gone, then once the baby is born and old enough to travel (what, three, four months?) Mike and I would buy plane tickets and head back to Hawaii. We would rent a swanky jungle house for a couple weeks while we go to the beach and scope out land to purchase. We'll of course find the perfect spot, about four acres, and then we'll hire a good friend, maybe Robert, to consult on what needs to happen next. Clear this, clear that, then start planting. Avocados, coconuts, oranges, mangoes, and the vegetable garden. Then we'll design and start building our dream jungle house. Not too far into the jungle, too many mosquitoes. Halfway between nowhere and the beach. Of course we'll become friends with our native Hawaiian neighbors so we can live peacefully. And the dream continues, but I'll work the details out myself. Now you try it!
Whewwww, I feel much better. Once you get past any blocks you have about receiving something, it plays out beautifully in your head. And if it can play out beautifully in your head, it can play out in your physical reality too. I have an abundance of confidence!
Okay, now I'm going to eat an abundance of breakfast. Love love love y'all!
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